I Love Dubai

Being the sadcase that I sometimes am, it amuses me from time to time to substitute lyrics to popular songs with something else, of varying degrees of sense. Once I even rewrote an entire song – and then resolved never to show it to another living person, on the basis that it would probably get me jailed, or possibly just lynched.

Not long ago, I realised that the ever-brilliant Randy Newman’s fond-but-ironic I Love LA could translate over to Dubai quite well. So, today, I rewrote it. Given the upbeat, ultra-positive tone of the original, the Dubai version is probably best viewed as a tribute – an affectionate tribute – to the now-past days of excess and exuberance of a couple of years ago. But anyway – it amused me.

I Love Dubai (with apologies to R. Newman)

Hate London Town
It’s old and it’s cramped
And all the people smell of urine
Let’s leave Hongkers to the Communists
That town’s just a bit too real
For you and me, girl

Rollin’ down the Sheikhy Zee-ee
With a big-chested hostie at my side
Shamal wind blowing hot from the north
And we was born to ride

Rev up the Hummer, lay down some tracks
Blast Nancy Ajram baby
Don’t let those Indians pass
We’re gonna floor it so those speed cameras see blurs

From Shindaga to Al Wasl
From old Deira to Marina
Everybody’s very happy
‘Cause the money’s flowing all the time
This is the perfect way to fly

I love Dubai (we love it)
I love Dubai (we love it)

Look at that hotel
Look at those cranes
Look at that worker there, man
He’ll never be the same
Look at these women
Wish they wouldn’t dress like whores…

Baniyas Road (We love it)
Mankhool Road (We love it)
Jumeirah Beach Road (We love it)
Bank Street (We love it, we love it)

I love Dubai
I love Dubai

(We love it)

(See the lyrics for the original song here.)

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